Sunday, December 2, 2012

SELECTIVE HEARING ENGAGED

Having not seen my very best friend from high school days, a bridesmaid in my wedding and come to think of it, my daughter's Godmother, in a long time, I have finally seen her a few times in the past few months.  And along with seeing her, I have had the great pleasure of spending some time with her dad.  This is a man I always enjoyed sharing Thanksgiving dessert with, a man that I know my dad had great conversations with while eating the same Thanksgiving dessert, and a man that I have shared my retirement dreams. When he first found out that Ray and I were traveling to Panama to visit and research it as a place for retirement, he was "completely enthralled and enamored with our decision".  He wanted to know everything I knew and all of the reasons behind Panama being our choice for retirement.  Six weeks later, after our vacation, Ray and I saw him again.  He had just read an article in "The Economist" about Panama, and he again stated that he was so excited for us. (http://www.economist.com/news/americas/21567091-why-latin-americas-fastest-growing-country-so-furious-earthbound-bite-back).  Part of the article states:

Panama’s economy has grown faster than that of any other Latin American country this year, as it did last year. Growth has averaged nearly 9% a year for six years, transforming the skyline of the steamy capital. Though it lies in Central America, the poorest and most violent region in the West, the country’s 3.6m citizens are now richer than most Latin Americans.

According to my friend's dad,  "Panama's economy is just booming".  "The expat world is thriving".  "The banks are exploding". His son-in-law (my high school best friend's husband) was discussing with him the Panama Canal, taking a cruise through the canal with the probability of visiting us while on the cruise (when it is in port).  He was trying to figure out the best way to get to us.  Like I told him, along with his father-in-law, "it is a simple four and a half hour flight.  You fly to Panama City, and we come and get you".  Simple as that.  That was a happy conversation.  I look forward to more of those.  This man knows that every country comes with its problems.  He knows there is unhappiness in Panama, discord among many, and there are many things that need to change with as much growth and boom that is being thrown at it. He told us more about the negative comments in the article.  He shared the good and the bad and the ugly just as our friends, Clyde and Terry Coles (www.alongthegringotrail.com or www.alongthegringotrail.blogspot.com), have.  He knows that Ray and I are not stupid.  We are doing our homework.  We are making educated, not emotional, decisions.  We are willing to take risks, change our lives and our families lives to a certain extent, and we realize the effect our decisions could  make on others.

Then we encounter the negative comments of others.  Those that are trying to throw their concerns or fears, I guess, our way.  In the same week that I had multiple friends and family members telling us that they were so excited to hear about our adventures, cannot wait to visit us, ask enthusiastically how we have come to realize where we would like to rent or buy a house, and who want to hear more from us after our next trip to Panama in March, Ray and I also heard (or mostly I heard) the following:

How can you get so excited about something when you are leaving your friends and family?
What will you do when you get there?  Is there anything to do?  There won't be anything to do if you aren't working.
What are the houses like?  Where will you live?  How will you live?  
Why wouldn't you just move closer to your job (since the commute is so horrible) instead of moving to Panama?  (The point is to not work.  It's not about the commute.  It's about quality of life, so perhaps it is about the commute in a way.).

Ray cannot contribute to the negative comments he has heard that are listed above, because he has learned to not listen, to not comment, and to not share as much.  I need his shell.  I need a thicker skin.  I need to use my hearing disability, perhaps, to filter the negativity and the pessimism.  I will learn to use my supposed "selective hearing" to hear from those excited for us.  Refer me to an article in a magazine like my friend's father did, and let me make up my own mind. I am all for hearing the concerns, as long as they are researched and valid concerns.  I am just no longer willing to entertain those concerns from those not knowing.    





2 comments:

  1. There is internet in Panama everywhere. Skype and google chat are wonderful things! There is plenty to do. Houses may be a little different, usually block with tin roofs, but you can have anything you want, anything as upscale as you would find in the US. You may have to commute to the produce stand every day!

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  2. Kris,
    When we go back in March, we are going to look further into housing (with a realtor, etc). We have an idea of what we want and don't want, but we will also have to see what's available when we finally get there! I cannot wait for fresh produce!

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